Tuesday 25 December 2012

Cut and Paste The Oz 24/12




CUT & PASTE

Member for Porn tries his hand at fabricating conspiracy instead of the usual adultery

September 29, ABC's Lateline:
GEORGE Brandis: For months one minister after another trotted out and said that Mr Ashby's claim was outrageous, that it was vexatious, that he was more rehearsed than a kabuki actor, attacked his good faith, suggested this was a put-up job by the Coalition, and ridiculed and humiliated a man who had complained of being sexually harassed . . . Today, the government has conceded, in effect, the validity of his claim, by paying him a very substantial sum of money.
Deja vu all over again. Labor MP for Moreton Graham Perrett writes to AFP Commissioner Tony Negus, December 21:
I WRITE to refer for your investigation information indicating that (Mal Brough and others) may have committed criminal offences in relation to their participation in a political conspiracy designed to harm (Peter Slipper) . . . This conspiracy involved using a fabricated sexual harassment claim to politically damage and publically (sic) humiliate Mr Slipper.
Still, Mr Perrett knows about fabricating sex. Samantha Maiden, Sunday Telegraph, September 30:
THE Labor MP dubbed The Honourable Member for Porn over his first novel, Graham Perrett, has penned a saucy sequel featuring more explicit sex scenes titled The Big Fig.
But Mr Perrett, who holds the seat of Moreton, one of the most marginal federal electorates in Australia, concedes he may delay publication until after next year's election to save his political hide . . . Determined to give 50 Shades Of Grey author EL James a run for her money, Mr Perrett has penned a new book charting the sexual escapades of a Catholic school teacher, Lawrence Lalor. "The main character does not take a vow of abstinence. That's for sure," he said. "Certainly, the main character's failings have not been resolved. He can't keep his pants on."
Mr Perrett's first novel, The 12th Fish, followed the adventures of Lalor, who enjoys the sexual attentions of a married colleague and another woman when he is posted to a small rural Queensland town.
Even his own mother described it as "way too rude, very vulgar".
Just once? Craig Emerson, Sky's Australian Agenda yesterday:
AND it is true, I admit it, it is true, we said there would be a surplus.
The Sydney Morning Herald, Friday:
THE government had said more than 200 times it would return the budget to surplus, Mr Hockey said.
Why are people upset? Tim Dunlop, October 4:
I MUST admit I don't understand the rules of outrage as they are currently applied in Australia. . . . It is odd that we tend to get more upset about incivility than we do about matters of deep political import. There are so many things we could devote our outrage to, from the political neglect over climate change to the plight of the poor in Australia to kids suffering mandatory, indefinite detention, or, indeed, to Julia Gillard's own stance on gay marriage, but we don't. Not really.
Upset! Tim Dunlop, December 21:
TAKE this recent article by economist Henry Ergas. It doesn't matter how valid the rest of his argument is, what grown-up would take him seriously when he couches the entire piece in the sort of wordplay and name-calling that would make an intelligent 10-year-old wince? Honestly, this is how it starts, an allegedly serious opinion piece in an allegedly serious newspaper written by an allegedly serious commentator.
Henry Ergas, December 17, The Australian:
LITTLE Miss Bossy tells everyone what to do. Little Miss Naughty is badly behaved. And Little Miss Fickle breaks her promises. But no one is as scary as Little Miss Ogyny, especially when she goes on the attack.
A book for Tim Dunlop? Wikipedia:
MR Nobody is the 47th book in the Mr Men series by Roger Hargreaves (also the author of the Little Miss series). Mr Happy finds somebody who is nobody. Mr Nobody is literally not much of a person.

Member for Porn tries his hand

SOMEBODY in the Labor Party with a penchant for extra-marital sex fires up their creative juices
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